What is the best solution?

M. likes to play on the computer when he gets home and watch 1-2 PBS shows. That is 1 1/2 hour of screen time everyday. It sounds like too much to me but I often don't feel like fighting about it since that is his time: he has to follow direction all day at school, do his few chores at home, walk around the neighborhood with me... What is the right balance? How much is too much?

Play with them!

So I am always complaining that M. spends all his time on the computer, watching TV and working in his math workbook and not enough time playing with toys and using his imagination. So last week, instead of complaining, I decided to actually remind him how much fun playing can be and we played together 3 days in a row! One day we build racecars out of tinker toys and raced them...
Another day we worked together to build a lego house and statue...

And another we painted a platform for his lego collection (turns out, paint warps the cardboard we used so that platform is going to meet its end when I find a replacement!).

We both found out that it is fun to build together and to use our imagination! I also have noticed that M. has been spending more time drawing (and not surprising he likes to draw intricate abstract things) since we have drawn together!
Lesson learned: I need to play with my son more often!

Sick baby

So, lil. J. has spiked a fever for the past 2 nights, fine during the day, 103 degrees at night! I have been very grateful for the guest bed that he and I have shared. He has not been sleeping well so once he wakes up and after a dose of Tylenol and some liquids I have slept with him. Not so comfortable for me but at least he has woken up pretty rested!
 This little bout of sickness/fever has made me remember all those parents out there of sick babies/children who spend many hours of their day caring for their little ones. May the Lord bless them with perseverance, patience and love! And thank you Lord for my healthy boys!

and then you want to give up!

because your son's reaction to the cool factor of going alone with mommy to Target to buy a toy is met with: I don't want to go when daddy comes home, I want to watch my TV show first, I want J. to go with us, I want to go when it is his bedtime... So we shall see how it goes!

Say yes when you can!

Going along with my post from the other day, I realized that I really need to start saying yes more often to M. my oldest. I have noticed that I spend a lot of time correcting him and not so much building on the positive things that he does. He is a sensitive boy who cares about others, he is very friendly and smart, he loves to do math worksheets for fun, and he loves his family. I want to make his hours at home and before bed (3 PM-8PM) more loving and positive. Understandly my 20 month old requires a little more supervision and attention but that doesn't mean that M. cannot get any mommy special time! We do spend 30-45 minutes most nights playing board games after J. goes to bed which gives us some mommy-son time but I want to do more! And it should be something that he enjoys! I am going to try to have a mommy-son date once a week for starters. Today we will go browse at Target and choose a lego set that we can build together since that is something we both love to do together. We might start making a weekly trip to the library to choose some books to read together (I have been going through my classroom library but a trip to the library "sans" brother might be fun)! Daddy will get to spend some quality time with little brother who is so attached to mommy and I will get to spend quality time with a young boy who is growing up fast! I am going to say
                        
                             YES

more often!

Mommy time

I have been trying to save money for a family trip to Europe so I have not been taking any weekly outing trips by myself in order to curb my desire to spend money. However, I am realizing that I do need that time out by myself. Watching my favorite show while the kids are sleeping is nice but it is not the same as going somewhere on my own! And there are ways to indulge a little without breaking the bank (I am drooling over a pair of cowboy boots that I do not need so I will control myself): for example I could head to Starbucks and read a book while enjoying a hot chocolate, I could take a quick run in the neighborhood, or go enjoy a dessert or appetizer somewhere. Go with a budget in your mind so you do not feel guilty and end up not enjoying your special time to yourself. I have noticed that I am a more patient mom and wife if I have regular child free time. So take the time to schedule yourself some "me time" which I will make sure to plan in my week from now on.

Daily to do's

I love routines, to do lists and feeling like I have accomplished something during the day. I have been lacking lately in my oldest son's routine. He asks to watch a show or play computer and often time I will say yes just so I have a little time to myself (I do limit it to 30 or so minutes, well sometimes an hour).This summer I made a chart to remind him of daily chores and work as well as fun choices we could make.

So here I start again with a large chart to remind him of his choices and the few things he does need to do when he gets home. I have found that visual reminders help us both and that after a few weeks we do not need the chart because the routine is established.